


Downtime

by tactical_nuclear_penguin



Category: Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic II: The Sith Lords
Genre: Darkside thoughts, F/M, Friendship, Mind/Mood Altering Substances, Romance, Sexual Content, Slowmance, Team Bonding, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-19
Updated: 2016-01-13
Packaged: 2017-12-20 16:22:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 8,773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/889342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tactical_nuclear_penguin/pseuds/tactical_nuclear_penguin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Simply filling in the moments of KOTOR 2 when the group wasn't fighting evil or saving the galaxy.<br/>LSF Jedi (Light Side...ish female Jedi) as the Exile.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Pazaak and Booze

**Author's Note:**

> So the Exile is Sera Moors. She is (mostly) lightside and is used to a double-bladed silver lightsaber. Head-model is the one with brunette hair that's in a messy pony-tail, for reference. In context of the game, she just finished her conversations with everyone on the ship after Peragus, and they're killing time on their way to Telos.

“Soo...wanna play some pazaak?”

 

Sera glanced over from the galaxy map, as the man continued to idly fiddle with the controls of the Ebon Hawk.  

 “Don’t you need to...I don’t know - fly the ship or something?”

“Remember how I just said it was on autopilot?”

 

The once-Jedi quirked a brow, before removing her visor, “Then what are you doing?”

“Seeing what the ship can do without actually doing it.  I figure once we get to Telos we need to leave as _quickly_ as physically possible, so I’m trying to learn the systems _now_ instead of when the old hag is telling me how much of an idiot I am for not knowing how to fly her,” he continued to work the controls without glancing over his shoulder.

“But how do you really feel?” Sera teased, a smile pulling at her lips as she sat herself in the copilot seat a few feet from him - dropping the visor on the floor beside her.

 

“You thought I was trying to look busy, huh?”

“Yep.”

“Well...I originally was.”

“Thought so.”

“So, do you wanna play pazaak or what?” the scoundrel slowed his hand movements on the controls, before shooting the Exile a side-glance.

 

“How long until Telos?” she asked, as the man began to reach into his back pocket, before pausing to consider her words.

“Uh...a few hours.”

“Sure I’ll play.”

“Alright,” Atton finished the motion of removing his cards, before fanning them out and selecting specific ones from the deck, “I’ve personally been in prison and don’t have much money so—”

“Let’s just play for practice,” Sera finished, propping her feet up on the controls in front of her.  

Atton thought about it for a moment, before narrowing his eyes in thought, “How about...first round or two for warm up.  Then we raise the stakes?”

“With what?  The stuff we stole from the planet we blew up?”

“...On accident.  The planet we blew up on _accident_.”

“Right, right.  Or do you have a better idea?” she challenged, eyes locked onto the view just outside the ship.

Atton paused, as he continued to go through the deck he was holding, before shaking his head, “I’ll figure it out.  Let’s just play a few rounds as warm up.”

 

Handing Sera the pile he had been sorting through, he smiled, “I figured you didn’t have a side-deck sitting around.”

“Thanks.  But how do _you_ have a deck at all?  Weren't you just in prison?”

“They let me keep the deck so I would stop singing in my cell,” he smiled, causing the Exile to shake her head and laugh under her breath.

 

Shuffling the other ‘main card’ deck, Atton placed the cards on the console between them, before waving a hand for Sera to start.

Pulling a card, she placed it next to the left of the pile.  

 

“So...” Atton began, taking his turn, “You seem kind of disconnected from the Universe since the War.  What were you up to?”

 

Sera took her turn.  It was 12 to 3.  Her with twelve.

“Stuff.”

 

He pulled a card - adding 10 to his three.  Pulling a card from his hand, he pushed it up to 18 with a positive 5 card.

 

“Stand.”

“Eh...poodoo.”

 

His eyes jumped to Sera, “Did a Jedi just swear?”

“Not a Jedi,” she pulled a card.  14 to 18.  Sliding a card from her hand, she smiled.

Positive 5 - putting her at 19.

“I stand.”

“Shit.”

“Oh, but I'm not allowed to swear?" Sera tilted her head as she glanced over at Atton.

“You know what I mean.  Seriously, isn’t it against the Jedi Code to swear?  I thought you were all pure creatures that couldn’t even think about anything other than rainbows or you’d instantly burst into flames and force-lightning everyone.”

“What makes you think I’m not going to?” the Exile added in a light tone, examining her side-deck.

 

Atton's brows shot up, “You said you didn’t go red!”

“It’s just a blade color, really.  I don’t see why people get all angry about it.  What if I don’t like the color red and I’m evil?”

“It does seem like you get more variety as a Jedi than a Sith,” he reasoned, replacing the cards on the console, “With the color of you lightsaber I mean.”

“It’s true.”

 

She pulled a card.

 

“But did you act like a free teenager after you were exiled?” Atton questioned, flipping the next card.

 

2 to 5.

 

“I don’t understand,” Sera chose to concentrate on the cards instead of looking up at Atton.

 

“This is just me being curious.  But did you...you know.  Break the code in every way you possibly could?  Or did you want to stick to it harder to prove them wrong?”

“Why would I stick to the code when they took the Force from me?” she held his gaze, as she flipped her next card.

“So what did you do?” he half laughed, “Go to the Nar Shaddaa's Red Light District and get it all out of the way at once?”

 

4 to 6.  Slow game.

 

“Not...entirely untrue.”

“Heh, no way,” Atton shook his head, “Nope you’re lying.  Fucking with the pilot.”

“It’s on autopilot.”

“You know what I mean.”

 

“Atton...let me explain exactly what happened and tell me how you would react,” Sera lowered her cards to focus on the scruffy man before her, “Imagine there’s a group of people who have been around you your entire life.  Imagine that one day, they no longer care what you have to say or listen to your side of the story.  Imagine those people take away something that feels as normal and essential as breathing.  Imagine they throw you away like yesterday’s rotten food.  How would you react?”

 

“Alcohol and hookers.”

“Exactly.”

“Wait...so you did that?” Atton’s face filled with an almost childlike grin at the thought of a Jedi doing ‘sinful’ deeds.

Sera smirked, shaking her head, “It wasn't exactly the high point of my life.”

“How low did you get?”

“Let's just say I don't remember most of it.”

“Holy shit.”

“I’ve cleaned up my act...a bit.”

 

They each finally took their turns.

9 to 7.

Neither played their side-decks.

 

“A bit?  Aren’t we being chased because you’re the magical last Jedi?”

“If I’m the last, wouldn’t that make Kreia a Sith?”

“Uh...shit.”

“That’s...awesome.  I’ve been taking advice from an evil creature.  Oh - and she’s bonded through the Force with me.  Atton, please crash the ship now.”

“Wait...I have an idea...”

 

Leaning under his seat, the man pulled out a rather large bottle.

“Is that...alcohol?”

“Yes.”

“How did you find--”

“It was around and I felt a mighty need.”

“A mighty need.  Something tells me you could have grabbed a medpack instead of that.”

“Shh just drink.”

 

12 to 10.

 

Sera opened the top of the bottle and sniffed the liquid, before grimacing.

“It makes the air burn.”

“You know that means it’s good,” Atton smiled, taking his turn.

“Wait it’s my turn!”

“You’ve had a long day.  Take a drink then go.”

“You’re a terrible influence, Atton Rand” the Exile smiled, before taking a rather hearty sip of the liquid - offering him back the bottle after she took her turn.

 

16 to 18.

 

Sera placed a positive 3 card from her hand.

 

19 to 18.

 

“Shit.  I didn’t think you’d be good at this game,” Atton admitted, pulling a card.

 

19 to 24.

 

Glancing at his side-deck he smiled and placed a card on the center console.

 

19 to 20.

 

In his victory, Atton took a rather large sip of the liquid, his face contorting as he swallowed, “This shit burns.”

“It’s not bad for a random bottle from a planet we exploded.”

“...On accident.  I’m going to end up in jail again because of you, aren’t I?”

Sera smiled, as Atton reset the deck, handing the bottle back over to the Exile.

 

“1-to-1 I believe?” he asked, reaching for the bottle after she finished another swig.

“Yup.”

“Wanna add some stakes?”

“Kath hound or—?”

“Wow beautiful and witty - you must have made all the Jedi boys turn dark,” Atton smirked as Sera drank.

“Cheap flattery but good booze.  I’ve had worse times,” she smiled, her cheeks growing a bit red from the alcohol in her system.

“So what should we put on the line, my intoxicated friend?” Atton asked, taking another sip himself - pulling the bottle away to note how it was half empty in such a short period of time.

“I am rather sober, actually.”

“Your face is red.”

“So is yours.”

 

Atton laughed to himself, turning the bottle to see what they were actually drinking.  He was feeling far too much for the short amount of time they had been sharing the bottle.  The label was worn off either by time or poor storage.  Well - whatever it was, he was not disappointed.  

 

“Alright - stakes.”

Sera laughed a bit to herself, struggling to hold a straight face.

“What?” Atton rose a brow - confused.

“I keep thinking kath hound meat - I’m sorry,” she continued laughing - small giggles turning into belly laughter.  Atton found himself laughing along with her, shaking his head.

“Dammit Sera.”

 

The cockpit’s doors pulled open, revealing the hooded older woman, with a disapproving sigh heavy upon her lips.

 

Upon seeing Kreia, Atton’s drunken reaction was to laugh harder - nearly falling out of his chair.

 

Sera attempted to pause her laughter, turning her attention to the woman.  

 

“How’s your hand, Kreia?” she asked, barely holding a straight face as Atton finally lost his balance and hit the floor - pulling a laugh from the Exile.

 

“It does not pain me.  This display however,” she shook her head, “I told you he was a fool.  If you follow a fool, you are no better than he.”

 

Turning on her heel, the old woman disappeared down the hall - leaving Atton and Sera alone in their drunken amusement.  

  
  
  
  
  
  



	2. Arrested Again

“And I’m imprisoned for a _third_ time...” Atton sighed, as the TSF locked them in the small apartment.  

“Quiet, fool,” Kreia sneered, “We should all take this opportunity to rest.”

****

The old woman moved across the room, sitting herself with her legs crossed in a meditative pose.  Atton sighed in annoyance, before noticing Sera.  She was staring out of the window with a faraway look in her eyes.

****

“You alright?” he asked, setting himself beside her on the bed next to the window.

“Yeah...just thinking.”

“About...?”

“How quickly I can hack that door and make a run to the Ebon Hawk before they could kill us all,” her voice monotone, as she continued to stare.

“That...was not what I was expecting.”

“I know.  But you asked, and I was honest,” Sera shot him a side-glance with a slight smile.

“Good to know you’re secretly hiding ideas that would get us all killed,” Atton nodded with a smirk, lying back on the bed - crossing his arms behind his head.

“Always and forever,” the exile smiled back, pulling her legs up onto the bed.  

****

“You wanna know what the worst part of this is?” Atton asked, watching as the Exile lay herself down next to him.

“Hmm?”

“They took my pazaak deck.”

“Those nerf-herders.”

****

“It has been a rather long day.  We should all rest,” Kreia’s voice from across the room boomed, causing Sera to frown - eyes glued to the ceiling.

****

“I will rest shortly,” she replied curtly, tucking her arms behind her head - mirroring Atton’s pose beside her.

 

A moment passed of silence before Atton nudged the woman beside him with his shoulder - his voice soft, “Why do you listen to her?”

“Kreia?”

“Yeah.  She seems just...mean and unhelpful.  It was a mix of you, me, and...I hate to admit this - but that T3 droid that got us off of Peragus.  Not her.”

“She’s...helping me.”

“How?  She just seems to be slowing us down.”

“Us?” Sera rose a brow, “I thought you were trying to get away as soon as possible?”  
“I...uh...” Atton cleared his throat, “I’m still deciding that.”

“Deciding, huh?” Sera smiled over at Atton, “Based on what?”

The pilot shrugged, as the Exile shook her head - brushing off his lack of answer.

“Still haven’t answered my question,” the pilot pointed out, rolling his head to the side to watch her.

“About Kreia?”

“Yeah.”

“I’m a rusty ex-Jedi that’s being chased by Sith,” she shrugged, “I hadn’t felt the force in years before Peragus.  I...need training.”

“Can’t we find an old holocron or something that at least has both hands?”

****

“You two are aware I can hear you, correct?”

****

Atton quietly mouthed, “Shit,” as Sera's mouth opened into a silent laugh.

****

“There is much to do soon.  If you are not tired - please speak softer so I may rest.”

“It might be more comfortable if you lie down or something,” Atton pointed out, propping himself up on an elbow to glance over at the woman.  She was still sitting on the floor - just past the foot of the furthest bed.

“Quiet, fool.”

****

“She is going to kill you in your sleep at this rate,” Sera whispered.

“I have not ruled that out,” Kreia called over, her tone annoyed.

“Please don’t kill the pilot...?” Sera half-asked, sitting up from the bed.

“Then come meditate so the Sith do not best you upon your next meeting, Exile.”

****

Atton watched as Sera forced herself to her feet, just to sit on the hard floor and close her eyes.

****

Sighing, the pilot kicked off his shoes and slid under the covers of the bed - keeping an eye on the two meditating women in the room.  He knew he wouldn’t be able to sleep.  

****

Two Jedi-ish people in one room, pretending to have their guard down?  No - not even a wink.  Maybe he could go into the bathroom and sleep in the tub?  No - he’d still know they were out there.  Too many years in that damned war...well Wars, made it impossible for him to sleep with them in the room.  His brain assumed they all wanted him dead.

 

Well, Kreia actually did.

Sera though - she was unlike any Jedi - Exile or not - he had ever met.  Some would call her behavior borderline darkside.  She swore, made friends, had emotions, drank, bet, and generally broke all the ‘emotional’ codes he was aware of.  Yet...there was a glow about her.  A good glow.  A calm.  A self-awareness.  It sounded stupid to vocalize - and he always felt awkward when he did.  When she had found him on Peragus in nothing other than her underwear, she was neither of those things.  A bit angry.  Scared, even.  But that was already far gone.

****

The pilot sighed again into his pillow, feeling the guilt of not informing Sera about his rather dark past.  It made him feel queasy to even think about.  The memories were borderline repressed, making them easy to just slide away.  It was getting harder though - with all the Sith and Jedi around him.  

****

Would Sera think of him differently when she found out?  

****

Atton opened his eyes to find a “meditating” Exile watching him out of the corner of her eye.  Seeing him look over at her, she stuck her tongue out, before actually settling into her meditation.

****

The pilot smiled to himself.  Whatever worries he had were once against swept away in that ‘glow’ of hers.

****

She would be the death of him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ANOTHER CHAPTER! Yes, I'm writing these as I play through the game. Forgot how fun it was. I did add the 'restored content' and 'fix a million bugs' mods, but it's still buggy to all hell.  
> Anyway - this takes place right when you get the Telos Citadel Station and you're arrested on the spot for the destruction of Peragus. The house arrest part. I thought there could be way more character development in that time, so I made it so.


	3. Training

Over the time they had been traveling together, Atton had grown rather fond of the Exile.  He even stooped to asking Bao-Dur if he had a chance with her - only to be brushed off.  Their recent time on Nar Shaddaa however, made “the big it” come out.  The “it” he had been hiding, and Kreia had even threatened him with.  

 

Then...there it was.  Falling from his mouth after some twi’leks told Sera that they recognized him.  He could have easily lied or at _least_ told a white lie.  But no.  He just kept talking and talking.  The words escaping from his lips as if they had been fighting their way out for ages.  The aura of calm breaking on the Exile as he told his tale.  Of killing Jedi.  Of how he _liked_ it.  Of how he deserted one group after another.  Of his general hatred of Jedi because of that.  And... _the_ woman.  The one that showed him the Force inside him.  And how he _killed her anyway_.

 

The look on Sera’s face...it bore into him.  A neutral expression with a fire in the eyes.  Of pain.  Anger.  He could tell that she was trying so hard to take it all in stride.  To not let it phase her.  To not break in that way that Jedi do.  

 

In the end, he wasn’t completely sure she hadn't - yet she offered to help him see the Force.  Even begin his path as a Jedi.

...Or something.  Considering Sera barely considered herself a Jedi - he wasn’t sure what to call himself.  Some nerf-herder who could do a few parlor tricks?

 

His own problems seemed so small compared to everything else which happened shortly after, however.  The Exchange had taken too much notice of them, capturing the Exile and attempting to both capture and harm the rest of the crew.  A busty bounty hunter, a stealthy T3 unit, and lots of blaster-fire later, they were all back on the ship - plus a couple of extras.

 

The bounty hunter who had been secretly protecting Sera on Nar Shaddaa, had decided to join their forces; as had a droid that Goto had ‘assigned’ to them.  Plus the Exile had repaired an old HK droid that had been mumbling idle threats since it had awoken.  Or turned on.  Whatever droids do.

 

With the ship on course for Onderon, Atton propped his feet up on the console.  Pulling his pazaak deck from his back pocket, he began counting them.  The rest of the ship had been asleep for an hour or so already – yet the pilot couldn’t calm his mind.  So he counted cards.  Plus, going to his bunk just didn’t seem…appealing.  Bao-Dur would most likely be there toying with Remote – as he always did before he slept.  Probably ask some pointed questions about the day.

 

Atton had been the one to front the rescue mission for the Exile – even taking on Goto’s ship with the Bounty Hunter in order to save her.  He could almost hear Bao-Dur's eerie voice taunting him.

_“You know Atton – getting yourself killed for the General isn’t going to make her automatically fall for you.”_

 

“I know, I know.  At least she’s safe,” he whispered to himself in the cockpit, hearing the T3 droid happily move around the ship.

 

Something soft hit the back of his head, causing the man to jump and quickly look over his shoulder.

“What’s safe?” Sera asked, standing near the back of the cockpit with a hand on her hip.  Sweat dampened her brow - her breath a bit faster than it should have been.  Instead of her normal robe - she was stripped down to her undershirt and pants.

“Hi to you too,” Atton rose a brow, grabbing the blob of material she had tossed at him, “Did you just throw your robe at me?”

 

“Forget something?”

“Probably.  What is it this time?”

“Training?  You were supposed to show up to the cargo hold over an hour ago.”

“I...dammit,” Atton’s brows pinched together in annoyance at himself, before glancing back over at Sera, “Wait a minute - if I was supposed to be there an hour ago, why do you look all sweaty?”

“Trained Mira instead,” she shrugged, still standing next to the galaxy map at the back of the cockpit, “Now stand your ass up.”

“What am I supposed to do with this?” he asked, holding the slightly sweaty robe at a distance.

“Eat it?  I don’t care.  C’mon.”

 

Atton stood - dropping the robe over the back of his chair, before following Sera to the hold.

 

\--

 

“I should probably change, huh?” Atton realized, glancing down at his vest and long-sleeve shirt, as the Exile began padding some weapons for their practice.

 

“If...you want?  I don’t care.”

“I could take it off... _slowly_ ,” Atton smiled, slowly sliding off his vest.

Sera fought a smile as she shook her head and returned her attention to the weapons.  

“ _Slowly…_ ” Atton repeated, at the sound of cloth hitting the ground.

 

Sera - out of curiosity - glanced up to see Atton with his shirt pulled over his face - arms slowly pulling it off of him.

“ _Slowwwwwlyyy…_ ” a muffled voice called, causing the Exile to laugh.

“I wasn’t expecting a strip show,” she mused, as Atton dropped his longsleeve shirt onto the ground - revealing a dark brown undershirt that was cut off at his shoulders.

“That’s what I’m here for; piloting your ship, making snarky remarks, and giving you a strip show.”

“I approve,” Sera smiled, lifting a double-hilted vibroblade into her hands, “Weapon choice?”

“Can I try two?”

“Mixing it up, I see,” Sera lifted two of the padded vibroblades, before taking a step to hand them to the man.

 

“Alright - let’s just see where we start and go from there?” Sera asked, quickly spinning her double-bladed weapon.

“Uh...sure.  Glad these are padded.”

“Ready?  Fight.”

 

Neither moved - eyes locked onto the other as tension slowly filled the room.

Sera suddenly slid to the left, causing Atton to respond by moving the other way.  With a push of the Force, she was right in front of him in the blink of an eye - their blades making an muffled ‘fwumf’ as they hit, due to the padding.

 

The Exile pushed him on the defensive, causing Atton to only react to her movements.  With a quick short motions, Atton found himself on his back - the covered edge of the Exile’s blade at his throat.

 

Her expression surprisingly light - though tinted with a bit of exhaustion.

 

“Alright…you win.”

 

Sera offered him a hand, before pulling him to his feet, “Okay - step one.  Don’t let me get the upper hand.  Everything you did was reacting to me.  I put you on the defensive and you stayed there.  Never once did you make a move that was meant to hurt me - just stopping me from slicing you open.”

“How?”

“A good fight will topple back and forth with who is in control every few moments.  When I lighten up - don’t see it as a break, but an opportunity.”

“Alright...let’s try again.”

 

In moments, Atton was on the ground - pinned under the shaft of Sera’s vibroblade.

 

“And again,” the Exile ordered, yanking him to his feet, “Concentrated too much on trying to attack me and not enough on yourself.  It’s a balance.”

 

The next round was different.  Instead of Sera taking the first swing, Atton dove in.  He put the woman on the defensive - finding it surprisingly easy to get hits in - when he was hardly touching her before.

 

A hit to the face, caused her to quickly back away - a rage slightly igniting the back of her eyes, as blood dripped from her nose.

 

“Oh shit—” 

 

A hit to his gut caused Atton to nearly double over - his own pride forcing him to go back into the mix.

 

As the fight progressed, it quickly slipped away from a light training match, and into a genuine fight.  Neither backed off when the other slowed nor reacted to pain.  Each was knocked off their feet several times but quickly fought their way back to facing their opponent.  

 

Several moments later, Atton used one of his blades to hit hers out of the way - taking a swing towards her face.  The padding came loose mid-action - slicing the woman’s cheek.  Before he could even take a step forward, his own unsheathed blade was removed from his hand - his back thrown to the ground, and the sharp blade at his neck.

Every time he broached the topic of whether she had fallen from being a Jedi, she always deflected it with humor.  As she pinned him to the ground with that sharp blade at his neck - nearly piercing the skin, he had little doubt to the answer.  He could feel the dark energy churning around deep inside her.  The energy had been felt ever-so-slightly when he talked about his past.  Something he had always brushed off as just empathy towards Sera when she was being insulted or annoyed, was so much more.

 

“Sera...stop…”

 

A light in the darkness of her eyes sparked, causing her to straighten up - quickly pulling the blade from the man’s throat.

 

“Sera?” Atton asked, pulling himself to his feet, as the woman dropped her blade and exited the room - shaking her head.

 

“Sera wait!”  

 

By the time he reached the hall she had disappeared down, she was out of sight.  T3 scooted by - humming to itself in that way that robots do.

 

“Hey T3 - have you see Sera?”

“Deet-deet!”

Atton narrowed his eyes.  He had never been very good at understanding droids - something Bao constantly mocked him about.  Spending time with the T3 unit had helped, but he only understood about half of what the metal box was saying.

“Uh...yes?”

“Dwoooo.”

“Wait - what?”

“Deet-doo-deet.  Dwooo.  Deet-deet.”

“That way?”

“Deet.”

“Thanks.”

 

Heading towards the other side of the ship, Atton suddenly halted as a form blocked his path.

“Leave her be.”

“This doesn’t concern you, Kreia.”

The old woman laughed deeply, “Fool.”

“I told her everything - you don’t have a hold over me anymore.”

“Are you really such an imbecile that you thought I ever held any control over you?”

“And she’s fine with it...with my past. ”

“Is she now?” a smile pulled at the side of Kreia’s mouth, “Is that black eye and broken nose a sign of how fine she is?”

“We were training.”

“That’s like no Jedi training session I have ever seen.  And where is your Master now, fool?  Why do you stalk the halls calling her name like a lost child?”

Atton closed his eyes in annoyance, before dropping them to the ground.

“Move your affections elsewhere.  They are far misplaced.  She does not feel as you do - and you’re only serving as a distraction towards her.  Now go to bed before you wake the whole crew with your nonsensical cries.”

Atton rose his eyes to Kreia, causing her to smile.

“Ahh...do you feel that anger?” she asked - an amused note to her voice, “That is what caused you to kill all those Jedi.  That is what caused you to become who you were and are, Atton.  You can pretend but it will always be there.  Or should I say _Jaq_?”

The man opened his mouth, but chose to close it - turning on his heel to walk away from the woman.

 

Her laughter echoed down the halls as he headed for his bunk.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Obviously this takes place post-Nar Shaddaa and pre Onderon.  
> I like to think that Jedi who have fallen (which she did during the war but never EVER talks about it) can easily fall back into it if their concentration is cut or they are tired. While she's pretty damn lightside but she still FEELS the darkside and it messes with her. Like in this chapter she's tired as hell from Nar Shaddaa but chose to train both Mira (who doesn't know she's Force sensitive yet) and Atton. Then I had fun with Kreia hating Atton because it's fun. I'd like to think that the reason that Atton and Sera (the Exile) get along so well is that they were both Dark at one point, and are recovering. That slip-up just phased her really hard so she separated herself from the situation. YUP.
> 
> Also I love how the end of the chapter is 'go to bed Atton.'  
> ANYWAY - more to come.  
> For reference, the order I'm doing planets is: Peragus, Telos, Nar Shaddaa, Onderon/Dxun, Korriban, Dantooine.


	4. Ship Fix

Atton sat atop the Ebon Hawk, listening to Bao-Dur hum a song he didn’t recognize.  He had been told by Kreia to not go with Sera to explore the moon.  She had ‘things to find’ apparently - especially due to the fact that she had fought upon the moon during the war.  Even though the Exile had asked him if he wanted to go - their first words since their fight the previous night - he declined due to Kreia’s threat.  Plus he knew that Bao would need help with fixing the ship.  It had taken a pretty heavy hit from whoever the hell wanted them dead now.

****

“So are we not going to talk about it?” Bao-Dur asked in his neutral tone, as he removed a panel that he had been working on loosening.

“What sort of ‘it’ are we not talking about?” Atton frowned, as he continued to work - eyes glued to the panel that he was tightening down.

“Atton - your nose is broken, your eye is bruised, you’re walking with a limp, and I’m certain you have a cracked rib.”

“I toss and turn in my sleep,” he winced as he bent a bit too far while working.

“Who was it, Atton?  The General should know if someone is a danger upon the ship.”

Atton laughed under his breath, “Danger on the ship?  We have at least two - possibly three-to-four homicidal droids, a bounty hunter, someone who I’m guessing is a Darth, and us.  I swear she collects dangerous people.”

“Avoiding the question, I see.”

“It was nothing, alright?  Can we drop it?”

****

Bao remained silent for a moment before the sound of blaster fire echoed around the forest of Dxun.  Atton quickly glanced up - a worried expression pulling at his bruised features.

“Why didn’t you go with the General?” the engineer asked, as Remote assisted him.

“The ship is broken.”

“We both know I’m more than capable of fixing these somewhat minor damages within a few hours.”

“Plus the old hag said that Sera needed to see something here.”

“I don’t care for her.”

“Kreia?”

“The General fought here.  As did I.  She doesn’t need to see anything here.  Anything she sees will just bring back old memories.  Those should stay in the past, where they belong.”

“I’m not a fan of the old hag, either.”

“The only difference between you and I, is that I keep my dislike to myself.”

“At least she doesn’t actively attack you,” Atton sighed, taking a moment to glance up at the Dxun forest.  

“Did she cause those wounds?”

“What?  Uh, no.  Not even remotely.”

“Was it one of the droids?”

“Drop it, Bao.”

****

The engineer narrowed his eyes as he studied Atton, before concentrating on his own work.

“Did you fight here, Atton?  On Dxun.”

“Why?”

“You seem more on edge than normal.  Though that can easily be attributed to your injuries.”

“Can we just work?”

“No one else on the ship is injured, Atton.  Why is that?”

“Because I don’t know how to Force-heal myself yet,” he shot back, sliding over to another damaged part of the ship.

“I see.  Visas?”

“No.”

“It was either a droid or Mira then,” Bao-Dur considered, “...or...the General?”

Atton sighed, causing the Zabrack to widen his eyes.

“She…?” he began, as Atton shook his head.

“We were just training.”

“That’s not training.”

“She kicked my ass.”

“What happened Atton?”

“She wanted to train pretty late last night.  Things got a bit tense.  Then it was over.  Can we get back to work?”

“Fine by me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been awhile. I've been busy trying to graduate from college. Only a few more months!   
> Short chapter with the results of the last. No Sera in this one. Next coming sooon!


	5. Aftershock

“Can I sit up here with you?” a quiet voiced asked from behind Atton, as the ship quietly flew to Dantooine from Korriban.  The pilot glanced over his shoulder at the Exile, a confused expression spreading over his features, “Uh - yeah sure.”

 

His gray eyes tracked her as she moved to the copilot seat beside him.  Sera appeared tired.  Worn.  Whatever happened on Korriban in that cave had changed her.  She had taken both he and Mira onto the dead surface - only to find a cave which felt like...nothing.

 

Not the sort of nothing that would indicate normalcy.  The sort of nothing that inhabits that of black holes, and women who have outlived their children.  Just...emptiness.  Yet it was full with a sort of dark energy he couldn’t understand - like an echo in the distance he couldn’t quite make out.

 

He had let her go on without him - and seeing the look on her face now, he regretted it.

 

“How are you holding up?” he asked, as she sat in silence.  Unusual for the rather chatty woman - even after their ‘fight’ before Onderon.

“I don’t know.  That cave…” her eyes dropped, “I saw things I didn’t want to.”

“What was in there, anyway?”

“A series of visions,” she sighed, causing the pilot to raise his brows.  Only moments before he had heard Mira question the Exile about it.  Instead of a real answer, Sera shrugged it off.  

“Visions?”

“Of the War.  Of the things I have done...and will have to do.”

Atton remained silent, watching her as she spoke.

“...Of things that were better left forgotten,” she shook her head, “I saw myself.  Fought myself.  The me that existed when I served under Revan.”

Atton felt a pang of pity for the woman - wanting to reach out to comfort her.  But he knew she would push him away.  Plus, he couldn’t reach too well over the middle console between them.

“Of...Kreia.  As a Darth.  You all turning on her, and me having to kill her,” her eyes rising to Atton’s, “You were there.  You told me who she really was and began the whole fight.  Vision-you was really brave,” she smiled warmly - though her voice was quiet.

 

Atton smiled back, “Well I’m glad you’re not in that cave anymore.  I shouldn’t have let you go in there by yourself…”

“No - I think I needed it,” her eyes narrowed, before settling on Atton, “Will you come meditate with me?”

“You know I’m terrible at that meditation stuff.”

“Well then you need to get better,” pulling herself to her feet, she grabbed his arm and dragged him with her.  Not sure where they were going, Atton allowed the woman to lead the way - his mind wandering more than he normally allowed.

 

Arriving at her room, his mind wandered even further.  

“Sit,” she instructed, releasing his arm.

 

Her bunk room was empty for once - though signs of others living with her were scattered through the place.  Mira’s boots leaned against one of the beds.  Visas’ lightsaber rested on the woman’s pillow.  Sera’s bright red visor sat next to her bed - as if she had been playing with it before sleeping.

 

Atton obediently sat, as the Exile mirrored the action.  She smiled at him, before closing her eyes to meditate.

 

Why was he here?  Why had she run up to the front of the ship to just bring him here?  Instead of closing his eyes - he watched her.  Sera’s expression wasn’t calm nor relaxed.  Her eyebrows pinched together slightly - mouth pulled into a slight frown.

 

His eyes glanced down to her knees - one of which was nearly touching his.  With a slight lean - he rubbed his knee against hers - causing the woman to slowly open her eyes.

 

“Atton?”

“Okay - what’s really going on?”

“I don’t—”

“Out of all the Force Sensitive people you keep collecting, I’m probably the worst to meditate with.  There has to be something else going on.”

“Maybe I just want to make you stop being the worst at mediating,” Sera ventured, opening her eyes slightly to watch him.

“Or maybe you’re full of it.”

“Or maybe I just...wanted to meditate with you.”

 

Her eyes opened fully to watch him for a moment, before calmly closing back to her meditative pose - brows still pinching together slightly.

 

Atton watched her for a beat, before joining her in the silence.  Closing his eyes, he took deep and long breaths.  Instead of fully relaxing, however, he found himself mentally playing pazaak.  It was something he naturally did to prevent people from reading his mind.  After doing it for enough years, he found it hard to turn it off.  A soft touch on his hand caused his eyes to slide open once more.

 

Sera had reached over slightly to grab the hand that rested on his own knee.  There was a firmness to the grip which Atton found oddly comforting.  Rubbing his thumb slightly over her fingers, he smiled to himself.  Her hands were slightly cold and smooth - though calluses from using her lightsaber were centered in her palm and on the edge of some of her fingers.  The contact, however, also allowed him something he wasn’t expecting.  If it was through the Force or something she was doing - he had no idea.

But he was able to feel her emotions.  Not like large thought bubbles of sad or mad, but almost waves of colors.  Dark blues, blacks, and reds slowly washed through him - causing his grip on her hand to tighten slightly.

This entire weird journey he had been pulled into was coming to a close.  Their next location would result in all the Jedi Masters being in one place.  They would get answers.  

Eyes rising from her hand to her face, Atton felt a pang of pity wash over him as silent tears slowly trickled down Sera’s face.  

From her lips, she quietly whispered, “There is no emotion, there is peace.”

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> With everything the poor girl has been through, she's just starting to crumble. Only two chapters remain! Post Dantooine and post game! Don't worry - it'll earn it's M rating soon enough haha.


	6. A Promise

“We should probably be sleeping,” Atton smiled, taking a rather long swig of the alcohol that Sera had brought him with that hopeful-Jedi-glint in her eye.  
“We should probably also not be drinking,” she mused with a laugh, as they stared out the window of what was once Kreia’s room.

The two were sitting against the opposite wall from the window - half leaning on each other as they watched the view. Sera had been avoiding discussing exactly what had happened on the planet, but considering how Kreia had left, he imagined it wasn’t exactly...super silky smooth fun. Of course, he didn’t press. He never did. With the weight of the universe on her shoulders, the last thing Atton wanted to do was make her more stressed out.

But even then, it was all coming to a close.

Malachor V. It was where the ship was headed, and where the entire mess would be solved. Ended. The pilot wasn’t sure what that meant, but knew it made him want to drink. Sera, apparently, felt similarly. He had been drinking alone in the cockpit when she had found him. A few witty comments later, they somehow had ended up in Kreia’s room. Atton narrowed his eyes in connecting the dots, but all he remembered was the word ‘saber-slaber’. Whatever that meant.

It was likely not a great idea to be drinking hours before a battle that may get them both killed, but Sera had promised she had a ‘cure all’ for hangovers. Some sort of Force-heal thing, she had said, as she took a rather impressive swig of yet another mystery-drink he had swiped in their adventures.

“You know what makes me mad?” Sera asked, her weight shifting to lean on him more, “Jedi.”  
“Jedi?”  
“The Masters. They’re...they’re a bunch of poodoo black holes.”  
Atton’s brows rose, “Poodoo black—...I don’t think I’ve seen you this far gone before.”  
“I’m not drunk. I’m just mad.”  
“Of course.”  
“You know...you know what they did? After I saved them and brought them all back together?”  
“Didn’t Kreia kill them?”  
“Well yeah. But before that. Guess.”  
“I’m guessing it wasn’t thank you?”  
“Nope. They tried to take my connection to the Force away again. But only after saying they didn’t do it the first time? I did? I don’t even know why I bothered. They’re a both of—”  
“Poodoo black holes?”  
“Exactly,” she clicked her fingers, falling so her head was resting on his lap. Atton wasn’t sure it was on purpose.  
“Jedi are just like that, though. You should know that Sera. They get so full of themselves that they can’t even pretend to understand the idea of being wrong,” Atton found his fingers gently playing with her hair - fingers twirling the soft strands around his fingers. Sera either didn’t care or didn’t notice - eyes locked on the ceiling as she continued.  
“I...just realized I’m on your lap.”  
“I wasn’t going to say anything.”  
“Just let me enjoy a few more minutes of being drunk and I’ll fix myself, I swear.”  
“Take your time. I honestly don’t mind.”  
“Well yeah - there’s a pretty girl right next to your—”  
“Or maybe I just think you deserve a damn break.”

Sera’s eyes moved from the ceiling to focus on him, burning with an emotion he couldn’t read.  
“I really fuckin’ do.”

Atton smiled, enjoying the moment more than he should have. He knew Bao was right. She was a Jedi - even if she shot down any claims as such. She was going to be - quite literally - a savior of the galaxy. He was just some criminal who had accidentally gotten stuck along for the ride. She mattered. She was important. She was _great._ And he was, in the grand scheme of everything, a no one. Even if the physical contact brought a smile he just couldn’t shake to his lips. Even if he looked forward to their little conversations - no matter how short or strange. Even if real feelings were starting to develop for her.

It didn’t matter.

“How about after tomorrow, we go somewhere that isn’t infested with Sith or Jedi or anything galaxy-fate-altering?” he asked, as she sat up, fixing pulling her hair from a rather messy ponytail.  
“Knowing my luck, we’ll discover some ancient holocron that will unleash a long locked away evil,” she ran a hand through her hair, “And then only I can prevent it from wiping out life as a whole.”  
“That...honestly does sound like something that would happen to you.”  
“I know, right? It’s really disconcerting,” she laughed, eyes falling to the floor, before locking back onto the pilot, “You know, you’re not a bad person, Atton Rand.”  
“Eh—”  
“Shh - yes, yes. Dramatic Jedi-killing backstory. You know what? So have I. I’ve killed Jedi. I’m not talking about then, I’m talking about now. You were some prisoner in the middle of nowhere that got sucked into this giant-weird-dangerous thing...and you stayed. You didn’t have to stay. You didn’t have to keep fighting. You didn’t have to train with me. You don’t have to be helping me, but you are.”  
“I’m weak for brunettes,” he shrugged.

She leaned slightly closer to him, “Oh really?”  
“Oh don’t do that. You know you’re attractive.”  
“I’m attractive now? I thought you were just weak for brunettes?” her smile grew wider, her eyes narrowing.  
“Are you having fun right now? Is this enjoyable for you?”  
“Do you think I’m pretty Atton?” she tilted her head, expression holding.  
“Oh, you’re so smug. Making the scruffy pilot awkward. Are you proud?”

She continued to move closer. Atton noticed, but remained still.

“A bit, yes.”  
“You’re also drunk.”

The pleasant fog that was keeping the upcoming stress of the following day, suddenly evaporated into thin air - causing Atton to be aware of Sera’s hand on his stomach.  
“Did you just steal my drunkness?”  
“Not steal - fix. We’re both completly sober now.”  
“Nice parlor trick. Why ruin a good thing, though?”

Sera shrugged, pulling the hand away from his stomach. She was sitting just in front of him - on hand resting on her own lap, the other braced behind her to prop herself up.

“Wanted to update you that I’m still proud of making you feel awkward, even when sober.”  
“Good to know.”

Sera leaned forward and pressed her lips lightly against his; the motion slow, careful. Giving Atton plenty of room to back away or stop it; not that he wanted to. The pilot smiled into the kiss, before a hand reached behind her back and pulled Sera closer; his tongue gently moving across her bottom lip. The Exile didn’t seem to mind - a soft laugh humming in the back of her throat, before she broke the kiss.

“I feel...like you’ve been wanting that for awhile,” her voice light, as she watched him - a faint red tint barely visible in her cheeks, in the dim blue light of the room.  
“Maybe,” he mused, unable to stop the smile from spreading, “But just a little.”  
“Well...of course. It’d be _super dark side_ to want to kiss a Jedi.”  
“You literally scream that you aren’t a Jedi like every day.”  
“Good point,” she laughed, eyes slipping away to the stars outside before jumping back to the pilot, “Hey, if we survive tomorrow, let’s do that again. How does that sound?”

Atton felt his heart skip a beat, but simply nodded before adding, “I think I would be okay with that.”

Sera smiled, before pulling herself to her feet, “Well, let’s not die then. Motivation to saving the Universe.”  
“Save the Universe for a bit of ass. Done more for less, to be honest,” he shook his head, as Sera moved towards the door; pausing as she passed by Atton to mess his hair.

“Good. See you on the other side.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was really cute to write. One chapter to go and there's boobs in it I swear.


	7. The Other Side

The day had been...surreal. Atton had fought in wars before, but nothing like that. There was such...evil there. He could feel it in the ground itself; oozing like it was alive. He could feel himself slowly succumbing to it; decisions a bit more rash than they should have been, his mild use of the Force fueled not by serenity but by _anger_. It wasn’t intentional, and he didn’t even know he was doing it until it was almost too late. Until he saw _her_. This damn crazy woman he had fallen for - the pinnacle of good against a Darth’s evil.

But they had won.

_She_ had won.

They were all worse for wear; even those with the Force too tired to actually heal themselves. But they were all alive; even Bao-Dur who had been assumed dead after they crashed. The crew had settled to sleep quickly after they took off - even the droids keeping to themselves. There was a sort of odd somber feeling on the ship; Atton not sure if it was his gut or the Force telling him such.

What had brought this odd family together was now over; everyone free to leave if they wished. Get back to their lives. The journey was over - and the pilot felt like none of them actually wanted that, even if none would admit it out loud. But the War was over; it was time to go home.

The pilot sat in the cockpit; nodding in and out of being awake. He knew he should have slept; there was a warm bed waiting for him after all. But he didn’t want to. A selfish part of him wanting to hold onto the brief few moments where the odd crew was still together. If he slept, then it would begin sooner, rather than later. People leaving, and everything going back to...normal. He hated normal.

After nearly falling out of his pilot’s seat, however, Atton decided to finally call it. With a resigned sigh, he pushed himself to his feet and moved down the hall. Before he could get far, however, he felt a hand grab his.

Sera offered him a smile, as she led him away from his original destination, “We made a deal,” her voice barely a whisper, as she dragged him back to the old hag’s once-room. Atton couldn’t contain the smile spreading across his lips, as he tightened his grip on her hand.

As soon as the doors closed behind them, her lips quickly met his. Hunger, lust, _need_ consuming them both. There was no shyness as he pressed himself against her; his teeth brushing against her bottom lip; hand pulling her close while on her lower back. She repaid in kind - purposefully rubbing her hips against his, a hand sliding into his hair, as faint pleased sounds hummed in her throat.

Atton was almost too aware of her hand finding his belt; loosening the buckles and straps, until her hand slipped inside; mouth breaking from his to move to his neck, as her hand moved up and down his shaft.

This was definitely not in the Jedi training book.

Atton closed his eyes and leaned his head back, as she pinned him to the wall. This was...honestly better than he could have dreamed. The pilot’s eyes only opened when he felt his pants drop around his ankles; finding a rather smug looking not-Jedi standing in front of him.

“Proud of yourself?” he asked, his hand reaching to the front of her pants; already able to feel her _heat_ through all the layers.  
“Yes,” she nodded, leaning into his touch, before glancing over her shoulder at the barren room, “Also I didn’t think this far ahead and how we’re going to…”  
“Shhh,” Atton’s voice right next to her ear, as he slipped his hand into her pants, allowing them to fall, as his point finger sought her clit. Finding what he was looking for, he pulled her closer to him; mouth seeking hers.

“I assume you have a plan then?” her voice heavy, breaking the kiss - yet keeping her lips just in front of his.  
“Would you like me to demonstrate?” Atton smiled, eyes not focused on her eyes, but lips.  
“Sounds like a plan,” she smiled, pressing her lips into his lightly, before Atton moved out from against the wall - stepping out of his long forgotten pants on the floor, and guided Sera to the window, “Put your hands here,” he leaned in, breath hot on her ear, “And bend over.”

He moved behind her, a finger running from her clit to her opening; testing her by sliding it inside once, twice, then added a finger. Sera’s hands gripped into the metal, as she glanced back at him, “Ahh...what happened to the awkward pilot?” she asked, her cheeks a brilliant red.

“I’m screaming on the inside,” he promised, cracking a smile, “You okay with this position?”  
“Mhm.”  
“Well then,” he pulled his fingers from her, and grabbed her hips - aligning their bodies, before finally allowing them to intersect. He groaned, Sera gasped, before pushing back into him. It...had been awhile - likely for both of them. The initial penetration enough to cause Atton’s brows to pinch together.

This wasn’t exactly how he pictured it...not that he dreamed of it before, of course. He always saw it with an oversized bed. The stars the only source of light. Music playing lowly in the background as he explored her skin with his mouth. Took her apart piece by piece until she begged for _him._ But dreams and reality were two very different things. There weren’t any oversized beds on the ship; just bunks, and a medbay that Bao-Dur was currently occupying. Even then, most places lacked privacy; the chance of someone walking in rather high. But they both deserved this; a moment away from the crew, away from reality. Just each other, and pleasure they were both in great need of.

He began slow, a hand remaining on her hip, as the other moved over her back. He watched as her head bowed forward - breathing already increasing and loud enough to be heard. So he went harder; faster. His eyes closing, as she groaned from _him_. Brown eyes opened just enough to watch one of her hands move from the metal sill, sliding to her own clit; her breath visibly hitching her throat.

It was nice to see the stress leaving her body. The weight of the world had been on her shoulders - and now she could finally unwind with Atton’s help. She deserved as much, if not more. This...this quick _fuck_ in a cold bedroom was far below what she needed. But it would help, for now. A nice distraction from the world. An escape with her snarky pilot.

Sera pushed back into him; encouraging him to go even faster. So, he followed the hint - hand on her back falling back into place on the other side of her hip - his breath hitching with every movement. He hated how quickly he was becoming undone. He was better than this; stamina should have been much higher. But he was tired; exhausted. Cuts and scrapes littered his body; and a dull ache sat in his muscles. His concentration was simply not what it could have been. But he’d try to hold himself together. For her.

“Fffff…” he heard her hiss, feeling her tighten around him. She was close; so _damn close_. Her arm nearly shaking from how quickly she was rubbing her clit; Atton feeling himself get dragged even closer with a strange sense of voyeurism. And then she came tumbling over; a gasp slipping from her lips, as she constricted around him - the pilot nearly losing himself right then and there. But he held on - but only just. Or so he tried. One thrust. Two. No, he couldn’t hang on anymore. 

Pulling himself quickly out, he stroked himself once, twice, three times; before he spilled his seed onto her back. Not his best performance - not by far. But damn, did he feel good. 

“Damn,” Sera panted, remaining hunched over the window-sill, before glancing back at him, “I think we both needed that.”

“Yeah, probably. Feeling slightly less stressed yet?”  
“You could say that,” she laughed, “Now, I’m going to go sleep for a year.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay they finally banged. AND THIS FIC IS FINALLY DONE. May add a random chapter at a later date, but for now I'm calling it COMPLETE. Thanks for being patient with my dumb ass.


End file.
